Dear Bitch

To the bitch at the grocery store who stole the last cart:

Let me first say it didn't bother me any that you took the last cart. I just needed a few things and my kids usually stay by me. Just to be sure, I made them hold hands** so they would at least stay close to each other and I could keep an eye on them.

But, on behalf of the women with the half sleeping two year old who you darted in front of, stole the cart away, and then proclaimed, "Huh! I got the last one!!", I have to tell you that you are a stupid bitch. Not only did you know you were taking the last cart, but you knowingly stole it from a women with a sleeping toddler.

I especially loved the dirty look you gave to the kindly older woman who gave up her cart to the woman with the sleeping toddler and pointed out she would just take one of the carts that the cart boy was bringing in. You are so lucky that it wasn't me who you took that cart from because I would have clocked you one and taken the cart right back. No jury in the land would convict me, not a single one you stupid whorey bitch.

Sincerely,

A seriously disappointed citizen

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Okay then! Now that I got that off my chest, I can tell you all about my seriously crafty project I did this week. Tweedle P has been in a queen sized bed since she was 3. But, because I am a cheep as, I never bought her a headboard. As part of the Hannah Montana room makeover I had decided I would make her a headboard. We thought we were going to make a sweet ass guitar headboard but that was way too much work.

Instead, we picked up some satin and made a padded headboard. Raoul welded a frame and I made the satin panels. Since the walls are going to be gray and lilac, I found some gray and lilac satin to use in the panels. I got a great deal because the fabric store was clearing out Halloween costume fabric. I also found some great buttons to give it a tufted look. The buttons on the purple panels are gray and buttons on the gray panels are purple. P loves it.

Unfortunately, the satin was pretty lightweight and some puckering occurred when I put everything together. And, when I was pulling everything to the back to staple it a seam popped and I had to try to repair it. Considering this was a first attempt I think I did a pretty good job.

**They were thoroughly pissed off that I made them touch each other. So much so that they both put gloves on their touching hands so they wouldn't have to have any skin on skin contact. Then, when we were done and finally got to the car, P threw C's hand down and said, "Thank God! I can't believe you made me touch him!...IN PUBLIC!!!!!"